Things in Jars

I've been buying canning jars lately. I find something very satisfying about putting food in jars. And it seems to be a theme of the this week - blogwise and reallifewise. I guess having the week off is turning me into a jar using fool.

Squash soup in jars!  And let's take a minute to wax poetic about squash soup. Holy crap, can there be anything better? Particularly, it seems, when made with homemade broth. Ginger and butternut squash and lots and lots of lime juice. Perfection with or without the jar!

While we're talking jars, let's check in on our sauerkraut.

Sigh. Making sauerkraut is not even remotely satisfying. We're 48 hours in and there are still weeks, perhaps even a MONTH to go!

(Clearly, things are pretty exciting around here after a week off!)  
     

Sauerkraut!

So, I am embarking on my latest culinary adventure. Fermentation. It seems that eating billions of bacteria is extra good for you. I touched the surface of this in my happy homemaker blog , but aside from a couple batches of coconut milk yogurt, there hasn't been much bacteria growing in my house (at least not on purpose). But, it's time to right that wrong. I think I've done a pretty good job of cleaning house (ie, most of the bad bacteria seems to be out of my system) and now I need to remember to add more of the good stuff. Well, rumor has it that rotten cabbage has lots of the good stuff!

Now, I'd love to add to this blog a laundry list of 100s of things that fermentation will make better, but my quick google search was vague. I think essentially you're increasing the good bacteria content in your digestive track which improves digestion, vitamin and mineral absorption, and basically, well obviously, improving life. And who (besides a few annoyingly happy people) doesn't need a better life.

I have made great strides in improving my digestion in the last 2 years. I think it's good to continue to fight the good fight.  Bring on the critters.  (BTW, there is an amazing New Yorker article from October this year that discusses bacteria and what our war on bacteria is doing to our bodies. According to the article we have 3 pounds of healthy bacteria chugging away in our bodies - helping "manufacture vitamins and patrol our guts to prevent infections; they help to form and bolster our immune systems, and digest food". Lack of these bacteria may cause a host of diseases.  I highly recommend the article)

Anyhow, bacteria yes. Let's rot some cabbage.

It's super easy to make. Chop some cabbage. Add some salt. squish it up for a while with your fingers. Add a bit of carrot and garlic. And then the sad part. Wait and wait and wait. For weeks!

So there is my sauerkraut story. I will be sure to let you know how it turns out. And BTW, those are shot glasses on the top. They are full of water and holding the cabbage below the brine level.    

Merry Merry

I had to make a couple cards yesterday, so we had a photo shoot and tried to pull ourselves kicking and screaming into the Christmas spirit!

Uhm, I'm trying to nap here!

NO!  I was not beating him.

Second try.

Even I got excited!

Seems photo booth gives you a mirror image of the world!

A Christmas Nightmare

Shall we have a little sing along?

So, there are many reasons one might complain about Christmas and/or December. Today we're going to focus on something that has been driving me crazy all day, Christmas carols! Now, I'm not complaining about beautiful Christmas carols sung at a festive Christmas event or chipper carolers strolling around the neighborhood spreading light and cheer.  I'm happy to listen to a little Vince Guaraldi once a year or so (special Vince Guaraldi shout out to my girl Tracy!). What I am talking about are the ubiquitous, perhaps obligatory Christmas songs piped into each and every retail establishment during the month of December. So, one goes shopping, paying attention to the task at hand (today it was making some returns) and really not even hearing the music.  But unfortunately, your subconscious isn't so oblivious. The song works it's way around your little brain cells. The next think you know you're singing an endless loop of some terrible song.

Today, I have spent the entire day singing 'oh by gosh by golly, it's time for.......' And then I run out of words. So I start humming, da da da da da da da.... And then I run out of melody, and what happens then???  Do I move onto another fascinating topic, NO!!!! The loop starts again... 'oh by gosh by golly.....'. And it goes on and on and on. Occasionally things get really exciting and another xmas tune will join in the melody somewhere among the da das, but after I while we go right back to, well, you know where.

And if it isn't this song, it's another snippet of some other stupid song. Over and over, for the entire month.

Help! And not in the Beattle's sense.

The White Elephant

So, most of you who know me (the real me as opposed to the blog me), know that Christmas is not a personal favorite of mine.  In fact, the entire month of December could be cut from the calendar and you wouldn't get much (any) complaint from me. But one Christmas 'tradition' I do like is a white elephant party!

At a white elephant party, everyone brings a joke gift. Then everyone draws a number. You chose gifts in the order of the numbers. When it's your turn, you either open a new gift, or steal a gift from someone else. Gift can be stolen twice and then their 'locked' (ie the person who stole it for the second time gets to keep it).

We used to have white elephant parties at work every year. My favorite present that I received was a bronze monkey soap dish. It's a standing monkey and the soap dish rests in his hands. Inside the soap dish the gifter placed a bar of soap and a box of raisons! I got it years and years ago, have changed jobs and desks multiple times and it still sits on my desk (I'll try to take a photo and post..... stay tuned). Well, that used to be my favorite white elephant present. Until yesterday when I got this beauty.........

No, it is not an animal on my head!  It's a hat. I guess it's from goodwill and is faux everything, leather (which you can't see) and fur! I will be SO HAPPY on cold weather dog walks when my head is blissfully warm.

In other news, I scored 160 in a words with friends game (for those of you who dont know words with friends, it's essentially a 160 point scrabble word! It's probably a good 50 points higher than any other word I've played!

As you can imagine, with all this excitement, it's time for a nap. Tune in soon, when I discuss the financial impact of my trip to the emergency room and maybe (as an extra bonus), post a picture of the monkey soap dish!.. whooopp!!! (Who knew an Ottoless blog could be so exciting.) 

Lazy Sunday

It's feeling like it's time for a blog, but I really have nothing to say. So, in honor of this cold, wet gloomy sunday, I thought I'd post some lazy sunday photos.

(Warning, these may be photos only a mother could love!)

If this doesn't make you warm and fuzzy inside, your heart is cold!

Why yes, his head is resting on my feet!

Hi mom! (everyone repeat after me, ahhhhhhhhhhhhh?)

Daisy and Otto duking it out over who gets the bed.

Looking left.

Looking right (Is it safe to make the next move?)

Yes! Onto my lap to watch 24!

  

Daisy and Jack Bauer.

 And speaking of 24, has anyone else watched it and noticed that the acting SUCKS and it is totally ridiculous, even sometimes laugh out loud funny.  And that Jack Bauer's very favorite word is 'NOW!!!!' (that's not to be confused with the word 'now'). As in, 'I need you to tell me where the bomb is NOW!!!!!'  Or 'I need to speak to the president NOW!!!!'  Or in one of the funnier scenes in the show 'KIM (his daughter), you need to shoot him NOW!!!!!' (screamed through a cell phone). Or has anyone noticed that Jack Bauer loves every sentence he utters so much that he needs to repeat it.

Turns out if you google jack bauer you get sites of Jack Bauer jokes. A few examples:

1. Passed out, surrounded by terrorists and nerve gas, and handcuffed to a table leg, Jack Bauer laughed to himself and said, "I have them right where I want them."

2. There is a deeper reason that Kim will not forgive Jack.  For years during her birthday and Christmas when Kim would look for presents Jack would just laugh to himself before finally telling her, "I give you my word."

3. When Jack Bauer goes to church to pray, he simply goes up the the priest and says, "Put him through"

4. All Video games now feature four difficulty levels: Easy, Normal, Hard, and Jack Bauer...No one has ever beaten the game on Jack Bauer.

Anywhoooo, if you haven't watched the show those mean nothing to you.

I will now end this babbling blog, as I have a lazy afternoon nap screaming my name NOW!!!! (No, jack bauer will not be joining me.)

Let's Talk Turkey. "Gobble, Gobble!"

Turkey place cards courtesy of True!

 Somehow, I managed to reach my ridiculously advanced age without having cooked a turkey! I'm not sure how that happened (well, 20 years of being a vegetarian may have contributed). But, with a couple years of meat cooking under my belt, this year I decided I needed to rectify that situation. In September, when my very favorite farm (Skagit River Ranch), began pre orders of their turkeys, I signed up, despite the fact that at the time I had no Thanksgiving plans or guests!   

I'll pause to give you the turkey's back story. My turkey had a good life. As my farmer wrote, it was a "healthy and happy turkey,...raised in sunshine and fresh air, on a spacious pasture". My turkey ate 25% of its diet in grass. The rest was organic spelt, emmer, wheat, peas, camolina, seaweed and sea salt!  (No, I have never heard of emmer and camolina, nor do I know why peas are good for turkeys.) My turkey could run. My turkey could fly. And, as everyone who saw me for the last couple weeks can attest, my turkey stressed me out!

Let's walk through out journey together.

Day 1, 'getting to know you'!

Mr. Turkey arrived on a cold wet Sunday frozen, wrapped in his plastic bag and a cute Skagit River Ranch logo freezer bag! The note that came with the turkey advised me that he would thaw 4 pounds per day. So, after a brief meet and greet photo op with his siblings, it was into the fridge for the 4 day defrost!

What  have we here?

Highly suspicious!

Otto and Daisy come to terms with brother turkey.

After 4 days of taking up way too much room in my fridge and turning from frozen turkey into limp biscuits, it was time for a trip to the spa. An ice cold salt/sugar bath is perfect for the skin! AND, it seems that ziplock makes 10 gallon bags (and 20 and 30) and they are perfect for brining.

Zip lock pool, prepping for spa treatment.

Mmm salt/sugar bath.

Glowing after a day at the spa!

Penny provides support as I apply post bath moisturizer (butter).

 Now, in looking at these pictures, you all are probably and possibly properly thinking turkey making is nothing but fun and games. But, let me assure you, these pictures do nothing capture the stress that went into each and every step of my turkey adventure. Let me detail some decisions that needed to be made along the way. (And let me add, as an aside, Google has a plethora of (frequently conflicting) answers to each and every one of these questions.)  

Where to thaw?
What brining sauce to use?
How long to brine?
What to brine in - pan? cooler? bag? refrigerator? some combination of? 
What kind of bag?  Does it need to be a special brining bag? What is food grade and what isn't?
Is the cooler food grade?
Do I need a bag inside the cooler? 
Where the heck to get a bag? (this involved two trips to Target and being sent to at least 3 locations within said, very large Target by no less than 4 different employees and a product locator device AND finally a Google search).

AND, we haven't even started the big stress yet. The questions continue, how to cook?  What to put on the turkey?  What temperature?  How long?  Where the heck do you stick a meat thermometer? It didn't help that the directions I got included a set that told me to cook the turkey for 15 minutes per pound and another that told me to cook for 12 minutes per pound (yes, that's an ENTIRE hour difference!)

THEN, there was the turning the turkey at 1 hour. No, my mother never did this, but it seems in 2012, you need to pick up a turkey that has been in the oven for an hour and use your hands to flip it over! (My mother's turkey also came with a plastic thermometer BUILTINTOTHEBIRD, that popped out to tell you it was done.)

And let's not even get started on the to baste or not to baste discussion! (Yes, that is a decision!)

In the end I would like to say it turned out perfectly. In truth, it probably did, but there were too many questions. Too many roads to follow. If I had a redo, there are some things I would do differently. But, the happy part is that next time I cook a turkey, it will be easy and perfect.

Is it brown enough/hot enough/cooked enough?

Or not so ALIVE and well (that can refer to me and the turkey).

Fortunately there was a real turkey carver who did a brilliant job with a very dull knife, removing one level of stress!

I'm really not sure how something that really only requires being stuck in the oven for multiple hours can be so insanely stressful.  But let's stop, deep breath in.... deep breath out..... and regroup and remember that merely one short blog ago I vowed to be Miss Glass Half Full, so I will end by stating the turkey was quite tasty. Today's breakfast of pumpkin pie and then lunch of left over turkey was even better. AND, I have two large batches of broth bubbling on the stove that will fill me with skin healing vitamins and nutrients. AND, even more importantly, Thanksgiving with lots of fun and full of great friends.

Thanks turkey and happy day after everyone!!

Hood canal table with view of canal through frosted window panes.

And a final cheer up for anyone who is still feeling a little stressed and wasn't sold by my glass half full ending. We'll finish today's very long blog with completely gratuitous, but insanely cute dog shots!

I love Otto with all my heart and soul, but it doesn't get much cuter than Penny.

This year I am thankful that my dog DID NOT pull the turkey carcass onto the floor.

The aliens flew in to watch the turkey prep!